CSI: Fuyuki City
by TypeMoonFreak
Summary: Just a funny short story.


Monday 5:13pm. - McRemitz Residence.

A woman with short hair returned home with her groceries. It had been a long day at work and she was ready to sit back and relax. Her husband never got off work until late at night usually, he worked for the local police department and was a decorated Seargent. She set the bags on the counter and losened the tie on her suit, she turned around to find a man standing in her kitchen with a long blade.

"You!" That was the only word she had time speak before the man rushed her and she screamed in horror.

Monday 5:36pm - Miyama.

A local drug cartel had been holed up the top floor of a tall office building, they dealt in everything from guns to drugs and their leader was a real tough customer. Two of the best officers had been sent inside to deal with the problem backed up by Fuyuki's SWAT team. A man and a woman team who had known each other their entire lives, it seemed only natural to make them partners.

Tohsaka Rin. A fierce woman with long black hair and a thing for the color red, even going as far as to request a uniform in the color and after hounding the department for many months finally got her way. She was as intellegent as she was beautiful, coming in at the top of her class in every aspect, including tactics and forensics. She along with her partner occasionally did jobs for the Crime Scene Investigation department. Rin kicked in the door and checked the entryway for her partner and the rest of the SWAT.

"Set up a perimeter and get a sniper up on top of that building. This guy has eluded us for way too long, I want him cornered this time." She pointed to a building near the back exit of the office building.

Behind her came her partner, Emiya Shirou. Orphaned when his parents died in a tragic fire, joined the police acadamy at age 16 and was the top of his class for sharpshooting. Since he joined the force not a single lawbreaker had escaped his juristiction, he was known in the force as "Super Hero Shirou". Lifetime friend of his partner, Tohsaka Rin. Rumors around the office state that they'd been dating for quite some time but any proof has either been denied by either party or just dismissed as rumors.

Emiya ran up the stairs after entering the building. "Where are you going you idiot? We haven't even set up a perimeter yet!" Tohsaka complained after him. Shirou turned around and the evening sun glinted off of his sunglasses.

"Exactly, we have the element of surprise. This is the only guy to ever get away from me, not this time." He said dramatically before continuing up the stairs. Several of the SWAT tried to stop him as well but he just wouldn't listen to them.

"Dammit! Alright, you see that my orders are carried out and then follow us up. I have to go make sure Hero doesn't get himself killed." Tohsaka pointed at the next highest ranking officer and grabbed her MP5 semi auto before running up the stairs after Emiya.

Already near the top floor Emiya Shirou encountered little resistance, meaning they were all staked out on the top. He ran up the stairs as fast as he could until he reached the large green door ending at the top of the stairwell. "Heh, no sweat." He leaned agains the wall and closed his eyes, what he was about to do would require the utmost concentration. "Trace on." he mumbled something strange and his hands started to glow, before long he was clutching a pair of .45 calibur pistols.

With a roar he breached the door and jumped inside, pointing his pistols in opposite directions and disposing of the two guards on the other side of the door by popping off a round in their shoulders. The two men grunted and dropped their weapons, crumpling to the floor in pain. "Now stay." he said and walked over to each one and punching them in the face, knocking them out instantly.

He walked through the hallway and peeked around the corner. There were two men standing outside an office with a large door. "Cliche Gil, cliche." he muttered and began to run down the hallway.

"The fuzz!!!" They shouted and began to fire their AK-47s at Emiya.

As Emiya sped up and ran along the side of the wall, he began to think about where the term 'fuzz' came from. I mean, cops never exactly wore anything that could be described as fuzzy so the term didn't make much sense to him. As he neared the end of the wall he jumped off and butterfly kicked one of the guards, as the other brought his gun up to finish him a hole was blown through his knee by a shot from down the hall.

"What kept you?" Emiya smirked, adjusted his sunglasses and stood up.

Tohsaka looked tired, "Too many damn stairs."

"That's what you get for skipping breakfast every morning. You know you should eat at least three times a day to maintain your energy." Emiya raised his index finger and waved it around to show his sincerity.

"Oh shut up." Tohsaka frowned.

The large doors of the office flung open, and a man could be seen sitting casually at the desk enjoying some wine the previous occupant must have kept there. "Kill the mongrels!" he shouted and his blonde hair seemed to stand straight up, almost like a popular character on Fuyuki TV called "Dragonball Z". At least five men rushed out of the doors, Emiya and Tohsaka took positions on each side and clotheslined the first two men coming out.

Just then from the hallway the rest of the SWAT arrived and knocked out the rest of the thugs with non-lethal rubber bullets. Emiya went into the office and confronted the man sitting at the desk.

"Gilgamesh, you are under arrest for numerous crimes which I don't have time to recite or we'd be here all night." Emiya read him his rights.

"You have no right to put your dirty hands on me! Pathetic mongrels!" He screamed as Tohsaka cuffed him and began to drag him out of the building. "You're all women and children! Unfit to lick the dirt off my boots! Don't think this is the last you'll hear of me!" He was babbling like a crazy person as they loaded him into a squad car.

Monday 6:00pm - FCPD Headquarters

"Emiya, Tohsaka, get in here now." Not a moment after they stepped into HQ their Seargent was yelling at them. They opened the door to his office and sat down.

"Good work bagging Gilgamesh, he's been out on the streets too long." A thin man wearing a long, blue ponytail sat behind the desk. He didn't look like your typical Seargent in that he wasn't one of those fat cops who sat behind a desk and ate donuts all day while filing papers. He was actually a pretty boy, one of the youngest seargents in recorded history and most of the policewomen were eager to do whatever he told them.

"Thank you sir." Emiya and Tohsaka said, standing at attention in front of the desk.

"We need you as Crime Scene Investigators right away, there's been an incident. Bazett has been killed." The Seargent sighed.

"We'll head there right now sir." They didn't need any other motivation to take the job then that.

Monday 6:13pm - McRemitz Residence

Emiya and Tohsaka walked into the one story ranch in the Shinto district, Emiya removed his sunglasses and found that blood covered most of the floor.

"Well it definately wasn't a firearm." Tohsaka said as she looked around the place.

Emiya walked into the kitchen while Tohsaka surveyed the living room, the place looked like something you'd see in a horror movie and the sweet smell of blood was heavy on the air.

In the kitchen there was no body, only a forearm could be seen lying on the ground. "I'm guessing some kind of a blade." The assumption was obvious as there were slash marks in the walls that looked like a sword had cut through it.

Tohsaka walked into the room and saw the severed arm in a pool of blood. "Oh god." She covered her mouth and backed away.

Emiya sighed. "It seems like the perp severed her arm, where the rest of her is seems to be a mystery though. I guess you could say..." He put his sunglasses back on, still looking down at the carnage before him. "...that she's been disarmed."

YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!

Tohsaka walked back into the room and smacked Emiya in the back of the head, knocking his sunglasses off his face. "Quit it."

Emiya rubbed the back of his head and looked back at her. "Too soon?"


End file.
